Getting discouraged

I know this is silly, but I have to admit that I am getting discouraged. I know that every baby comes when they are ready and that no woman will be pregnant forever. There are so many babies being born in the DDC right now though, and so many of them at 37 and 38 weeks. It's hard not to think "Why not me? Why am I still pregnant and miserable?" I know when this baby was concieved from charting, so my dates are 100%, along with my due date. I went into labor and Abigail was born on her due date, based off of ovualtion, so all along, I've suspected that I won't stray too far from that pattern. I've been guessing 2 days either way of my due date (with the rare chance I'll have another due date baby) That would mean this baby will come in the next 4 days, and I just hope I'm right! I'm only 2 days from my due date now, and so discouraged. I want to just be relaxed about it all, to sit back and let labor happen when it will. Let's face it, what control do we have over it anyway? It seems silly to stress over something that I have no control over in the first place. But that just isn't helping the anxiety. The thoughts of "It could be any time". I've been trying to keep myself occupied and keep my mind off of things, but I'm having such a hard time. No matter how much I try, my mind keeps wandering to the pregnancy and impending labor. Why does the end of pregnancy have to be this difficult? Can't I just find something to occupy me so I'm not thinking about it so much?
It doesn't help that my body has been in full gear prep for the past 2 days. DH and I DTD a few days ago which I think is helping my body prepare. On Thursday, I had contractions all day long along with losing big pieces of my mucous plug. I'm losing even more today. Even though I've had both of these things for the past few weeks, paired together like that, it makes me believe my body is in full gear, getting ready for labor. Of course it could still be another week, or just a few days, there is just no way to know. I just keep hoping it's sooner rather than later. I can only see myself getting even more discouraged if this baby is still hanging out in a week.
There are times that I want to just enjoy this pregnancy for the little bit I have left. I'm so uncomfortable though, and now I'm not sleeping worth crap. Having a newborn isn't a walk in the park, but at least I will have somewhat have my body back! Everytime I try to nurse Abigail, it makes me wish even more that this pregnancy is over with. It has affected our nursing relationship and I know she is just as emotionally torn as I am about it. She barely tries to nurse anymore, and I'm sure it's because she can sense how tense I am going into it. It always hurts, but now it's a whole new type of pain than I've been experiencing the rest of the pregnancy. I just dread having her latch on, even though I so badly want to still enjoy nursing her. Everytime she tries to nurse, I just end up in tears. I know how much we both want things to be back to normal and I hate seeing her so sad about it. She usually asks to cuddle with my breast, which I think if you are a mother who has nursed, you can understand. I think it's her way of still being close to what she loves most, what she finds comforting, because it's the closest she can come to it. I so badly want nursing to just go back to normal and I just keep thinking, there is an end in sight when this baby is here! Even if Abby does decide to wean (which I really hope not, after all we've been through the past 9 months) at least I can enjoy nursing again with the new baby.
Well, I better get to bed. I'm trying my best to be well rested at all times, so I don't have another repeat of Abby's labor. I hope my next update is after this baby is here!